It starts as a spark. Someone says something that rubs you the wrong way, and away you go.

It seaps into your spine like cold water over a hot pan…you hear it sizzle. The bubbles boil and then your skin tightens.

Your teeth grind back and forth as they try to make a sentence, “stop.” You try not to make eye contact,  because they’ll know. They always know.

You push from the depths of your gut the most difficult and forced smile on your clammy face. You only hope your teeth don’t shake to the beat of your pounding heart as it tries to sooth it self from the internal fire you feel. 

Breath in. breath out. Feel your lungs filling with air as if they’re being filled for the first time. Toxic air. Toxic people. Breath in and out. It’s over, it passed. You got a mild headache. 

Every time.